The crystalline core of identity

In my post on genius, I talked about how the true expression of what’s inside of us leads to authenticity. I will expand on that.

Acting from a place of authenticity is not something easy. There are many layers of falsehood built upon the core of who we are. They are the result of years of conformity and self-deception. It can be the result of education too. You learn, through observation, that people do things in a certain way and are satisfied with it. So, you try to act as other people do, to fit in or to feel the same kind of satisfaction you see on their faces. This is a good strategy as you grow up and develop into a world that is utterly foreign to you, but this is not an authentic way to live.

From childhood, you have a core that is something personal to you. From this core aspect of your identity, you develop other very personal facets, culminating into a sort of crystallized core identity. This is the authenticity that lies within a person. It is probably made of inclinations inherited from biology, mixed with early life experiences and the specificities of the environment. It is also my belief that it has a lot to do with what actions where available to you as a kid. As a kid, when faced with trouble or simply boredom, you naturally seek something to appease your restless mind. The action you take early on in life to settle the mind indicate what you are inclined to like. This is an indication of your authenticity.

When we are children, we act in a more authentic way. At this time, we are developing a way to interact with the world that stays with us as we grow up. Some people see the world in term of stories, some people are inquisitive and scientifically minded, other people have a deep need to exert their strength and use their senses to interact with the world. Everybody has something like that. Childhood is the time when you are supposed to develop this way of interacting with the world. Not everyone gets the chance to fully express themselves in childhood however. Some people are crushed under the weight of others expectations for them. It is generally the expectations of family members who do not see the value of this authenticity, as a result of losing their sight of their authenticity perhaps?

But even if it is not clearly developed, it is still there. As long as you interact with the world, your authenticity is present. It is the lens through which you look at the world. It is the thing at the center of someone’s identity and individuality. To understand one’s authenticity is to be able not only to look through the lens but also to look at the lens and to clearly identify it. To understand what it valuable in our own lives. To phrase it as a question: When you look at the world, what shape does it take? For some people, the life is an opportunity to do physically intense things, or to experience the most sensory pleasures. Tinkerers look at life as a place of possibilities. They see objects and are able to break them down to the level of functions. They eyes are special in that they seem to be geniuses of creation and improvisation.

For me, the world is a place to explore, to learn about. It is a mystery to be solved, a story to hear. I seek knowledge constantly, I listen closely at stories and tales, thinking about the origines of things and their meaning. It is not only an intellectual interest for the world. It is not entirely about understanding the world. Knowledge has an aesthetic quality to it. especially knowledge about the past and about nature. Knowing, seeing, making sense of things. I feel like this is something I should be doing. That it is the most important things that can be done in the world. The most valuable pursuit.

This is a feeling that is hard to put into words, but I do think that it is at the core of who I am. The way I try to explore and learn about the world keeps changing but the desire is still the same. It is indeed, like a crystal. The light projected from it changes but the crystal remains. It is pure, authentic.

via Daily Prompt: Authentic

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s